Tag Archives: living peacefully with children

What You Didn’t Know About Labial Adhesions in Baby Girls

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A silent moment in black and white When our first child was born, I was an informed parent. There was no way I was letting any doctor (or anyone else) retract his perfect, intact penis. At birth, and for quite a while after (sometimes until puberty), the foreskin is adhered to the glans of the penis. This is a way for the body to protect itself, and the foreskin should not be forcably retracted. I knew that many doctors are still unaware about how to handle intact penises, and I was prepared to protect my child.

However, throughout my life and three children, I had not heard about labial adhesions. It was during my fourth pregnancy that I finally read about labial adhesions in baby girls. Just as the foreskin is adhered to the glans in little boys, there are times when the inner labia of baby girls adheres, blocking the opening to the vagina, either partially or completely. One would think that in a country where intact girls are the norm, doctors would know how to handle something like this. However, I began to read stories about doctors recommending gentle pressure against the adhesion, using Q-Tips, vaseline (petroleum) products, and even the use of estrogen creams on baby girls. Usually, as this generally reoccurs in girls who have labial adhesions which are forcably separated, the estrogen use became cyclical until puberty. I was appalled.

So, I dug further. I couldn’t believe that something that is apparently quite common in girls and seemed to correspond with a similar phenomenon in intact boys, did not serve some purpose. Surface reading will tell you that labial adhesions occur in relation to some type of irritation. Digging deeper in the medical journals, I discovered that, just as with boys, separating labial adhesions is not a recommended treatment. The use of estrogen cream is not recommended. Placing petroleum products on an infant’s genitals is not recommended. The general consensus of those who have conducted research on this subject is that labial adhesions in little girls are a naturally occurring phenomenon, generally in relation to some irritant as the body’s way to protect itself. Parents should keep an eye on it and gently wipe well at diaper changes, but otherwise it should be left alone unless there is a problem.

Relieved to know that my gut instinct was right, I happily went on with my pregnancy and later gave birth to our fourth child, our second daughter. Fast forward about 3-4 months, and I noticed a labial adhesion. Glad that I had read about these before her birth, I kept an eye on it and continued to do so as the labial adhesion increased in size. While I now knew labial adhesions were perfectly normal, I was a bit nervous about the fact that it continued to grow longer. I also couldn’t determine what the irritant might be. We used gentle products, avoided soaps, didn’t give her bubble baths, and changed her diaper immediately after she voided. So, I hit the research again.

That was when I came across some more research that linked labial adhesions with food allergies. Everything clicked into place. We were (and are) in the midst of dealing with allergies, including a lot of food allergies, in our family. Our youngest child had the most immediate and observable reactions to various foods. It made sense that her body was protecting itself. So, we continued to take a wait and see approach.

The adhesions continued, stopping when they reached a certain point, and stayed for a while. I continued keeping an eye on it during diaper changes. Then, one day as I was folding laundry and she was having some naked time (a joke to anyone who knows this child and how she can strip off all clothes and diaper in about 1/2 second), I glanced over to check on her and saw that she was doing some self-exploration and that the labial adhesion was gone. It had served as protection for as long as she needed it and gone away when it was no longer needed. We didn’t try to force it to open, causing trauma, and so the labial adhesion hasn’t returned.

Our bodies are wondrous. They generally know what to do, if we only listen. Informing ourselves of what is normal (or a variation of normal), and searching out responsible, knowledgeable medical care when there is a true need, allows us to make informed choices for our families.

Disclaimer: This article is not intended as medical advice. Neither the author, nor Natural Parents Network, are medical doctors and do not assume any responsibility for medical decisions made by parents. This article is written for educational purposes only. The author and Natural Parents Network actively encourage all parents to do their own research and make informed choices about their family’s medical care.

 

Previously posted at Natural Parents Network.

One Ingredient Wrinkle Minimizer

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Wrinkles, while often associated with older age, are not caused by age alone, but by other influences which sometimes seem to go along with the natural course of aging.  There are many products on the market sold as wrinkle minimizers or defenders, usually containing a long list of ingredients, many of which are questionable for using,  and having questionable results.

You may already have a secret, all-natural, wrinkle minimizer in your kitchen: Virgin Coconut Oil!

Coconut oil is great for your skin.

  • Coconut oil helps hydrate the skin. drinking plenty of fluids will help hydrate your skin from the inside out. Putting coconut oil on your skin will help hydrate from the outside in.
  • Healthy oils. We’ve all heard the importance of eating plenty of healthy fats which contain Omega’s. Using coconut oil on your skin also helps add in those healthy fats, keeping the connective tissues soft and supple and defending against sagging and wrinkling.
  • Protection from the sun. Sun damage can aid in an increase of early wrinkles. New studies show that virgin coconut oil aids in sun protection, acting as a natural antioxidant that protects the body from free radical damage and prevents premature aging and degenerative diseases. At the same time, your body will still be able to make Vitamin D from the sun while wearing coconut oil. While coconut oil on its own may not be enough sun protection for you on those days spent out in the full sun, using it on a regular basis will provide some protection against other times.

Just keep a small container of coconut oil in the bathroom and lightly massage into your sin at night (massaging also helps strengthen facial muscles). You can even use coconut oil as an all-natural make-up remover. Try it for a couple of weeks and see if you notice a difference.

Giveaway: One-Year Subscription to Crafting Connections: 3 Winners! $120 ARV {5.18; Worldwide}

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This is a joint giveaway with Living Peacefully with Children and Natural Parents Network. You may enter at one site only. Please find the section marked “Win it!” for the mandatory entry and optional bonus entries.

Photo Credit: Living Peacefully with ChildrenCrafting Connections is offering three of our readers a one-year subscription to Crafting Connections Magazine. One reader will receive a one-year print subscription, and two readers will receive a one-year digital subscription.

Crafting Connections is a full-color magazine whose purpose is to help adults and children connect with  one another and create an authentic life using crafting mediums. With an emphasis on nature and creation, Crafting Connections hopes to help families connect with one another through authenticity and creativity.

 

From our reviewer, Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children :

About Crafting Connections

Photo Credit: Crafting ConnectionsCrafting Connections Magazine launched in the autumn of 2012. The owners, Andrea and Danielle, have a strong desire “to create authentic, connected and creative lives for [themselves] and [their} children.” While there are many crafting magazines available for adults or for children, they recognized a need for something that would appeal to families as a whole. They wanted to help other families who were looking for ways to connect with their children while growing and learning with and through their own creativity.

 

Crafting Connections Magazine

Photo Credit: Crafting ConnectionsI was pleasantly surprised when I received a copy of Crafting Connections magazine. The full-size magazine is in vibrant color and printed on heavy paper. When the owners said they wanted a magazine for adults and children to enjoy together, they meant exactly that. The size, color, and strength of this magazine make it perfect for snuggling with little ones and leisurely looking through. The magazine can stand up to multiple children turning pages and still hold its own.

The content of the magazine is down to earth. You won’t find unrealistic projects that leave you wondering why something sounded so easy until you attempted it. There is no perfection in its simple ideas, and that is exactly where the true perfection lies. The magazine gives ideas for families but stresses that the finished projects are culminations of the people, lives, and creativity of the individuals who make them.

Photo Credit: Crafting ConnectionsThe actual projects focus a great deal on nature and reusing items that would otherwise be in your recycling or garbage bins or using natural items found in or around your home. There are no calls for expensive or hard-to-find items, and you can easily substitute items.

The magazine would appeal most to those families wanting to do nature- and/or craft-themed projects with their young children but who could use some simple ideas to do so. If you are a wealth of ideas when it comes to this type of thing, you may not find the magazine as beneficial. While many of the projects are things that my older children (my four children range from almost three years to ten years old) like to do, the magazine is targeted mainly for families with smaller children.

 

BUY IT!

You can purchase your own magazine subsription at CraftingConnections.net. One-year print subscriptions (4 issues) cost $60. One-year digital subscriptions (4 issues) cost $30. If you would like to try out an issue to see if you like the magazine, you can buy a single print issue for $15 or a single digital issue for $8.

 

WIN IT!

For your own chance to win a ONE-YEAR SUBSCRIPTION to Crafting Connections, enter by leaving a comment and using our Rafflecopter system below.

One winner will receive a ONE-YEAR PRINT SUBSCRIPTION TO CRAFTING CONNECTIONS MAGAZINE. Two winners will receive a ONE-YEAR DIGITAL SUBSCRIPTION TO CRAFTING CONNECTIONS MAGAZINE. Contest is open WORLDWIDE.

MANDATORY ENTRY: Visit Crafting Connections and tell us one thing that has inspired you to get crafting with your little ones! You must enter your name and email address in the Rafflecopter entry system for your entry to count, after leaving a comment on this blog post.

Leave a valid email address so we can contact you if you win. Email addresses in Rafflecopter are not made publicly visible. Please leave the same valid email address in your mandatory comment so we can verify entries.

This is a joint giveaway with Living Peacefully with Children and Natural Parents Network. You may enter at one site only, and we’ll be recording IP addresses to ensure that there are no duplicate entries. That said, please do visit and enjoy both sites!

BONUS ENTRIES:See the Rafflecopter entry system for bonus entries to increase your chance of winning after completing the mandatory entry. All bonus entries are entered directly into Rafflecopter. Give it a try, and email or leave a comment if you have any questions!

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Simply Living Blog Carnival May 2013 Call for Submissions: Daily Lives

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Welcome to the Simply Living Blog Carnival cohosted by Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children, Laura at Authentic Parenting, Jennifer at True Confessions of a Real Mommy, and Joella at Fine and Fair. We hope that you will join us on the third Tuesday of each month as we share posts about simple living in our lives. Submission deadline will be the second Tuesday of each month.

Daily Lives Everyday life can be hectic. Talk to us about how you keep everyday things from overwhelming you. Are you an organizer or declutterer? Do you avoid shopping like the plague? Perhaps you treat yourself to picking up dinner for your family sometimes. What in your daily life helps keep things simple?

To submit an article to the blog carnival, please e-mail your submission to mandy{at}livingpeacefullywithchildren{dot}com anddelilahfineandfair{at}gmail{dot}com, and fill out the webform by May 14. Please write a new, unpublished piece for the carnival. We will e-mail you with instructions before the carnival date. We ask that you publish your post on May 21.

We want you to use creativity and to express yourself as you see fit. To that end, you are welcome to post at your discretion with a few guidelines in mind. Please be respectful in your posts. Avoid excessive profanity and poor grammar or spelling. As the co-hosts of the carnival are all advocates of peaceful living and gentle parenting, we ask that you not post about non-gentle practices or violence toward others. While we will not be editing your articles, we do reserve the right to not add your post to the carnival if it is not on topic, is poorly written, or goes against the guidelines which have been set forth.

Blog carnivals are a great way to generate blog traffic and build a supportive community. Your blog will receive links from many other blogs and you and your readers will have the opportunity to discover other blogs with similar goals in mind. Please join us as we embrace Simply Living through Simple Living! We hope you will consider joining us every month as we discuss ways we simplify our lives.

Hitting Out of Fear

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 Today is National Spank Out Day, I’m sad to say. In a society where we speak out against the hitting of women, against the hitting of racial minorities, against the hitting of animals, against the hitting and bullying of anyone, there are still a large number of people who think hitting children is perfectly acceptable or even necessary. It boggles my mind.

The thing is, parenting can be scary. We go through pregnancy with the child secure inside its mother’s womb, and then suddenly this little person is on the outside, completely dependent upon….us. Children depend on us for food, shelter, warmth, guidance, and love. It’s a lot to take on. The fact is that while some people who hit their kids really don’t care, most of the parents hitting their children actually love them and do so because they are afraid.

They are afraid….

  • that by not hitting their kids, society will deem them unfit parents.
  • that their children won’t respect them.
  • that their children will be hurt even worse.
  • of losing control.
  • of the pressures of life.
  • of not knowing what to do.
It’s a scary world out there, full of unknowns, but when it comes to parenting, you don’t have to be afraid! Your children come into this world knowing only you. You are everything to them. They look up to you. They love you. They just want to spend time with you and learn with and from you.
Forget about what other people might think. The only people who matter are your kids. Besides, haven’t you heard that you shouldn’t jump off a bridge just because your friends did?
You won’t gain respect by hitting someone. In fact, you will lose it. Hitting a person, especially a smaller person, in order to control them is called bullying.
Hurting your child will not protect them in the future. Helping them navigate life and giving them tools and techniques to deal with life’s situations will.
There are a lot of things in life you can’t control, and that includes other people. Accept it. Deal with it if you need to, and then help your children to learn to control themselves.
Life can be rough, but that idea that your kids are born loving you? Still there. Come home to your kids and remember that no matter how bad life gets, they love you.
If you don’t know what to do, don’t resort to violence. Learn a new way. Learn how to help your children navigate that allowing your hurt to rule your actions.
In the end, no matter why some parents hit, they still make that choice. With every day and every situation, you have the opportunity to choose not  to hit. Your children love you. Live up to that love. Be deserving of the respect they want to show you. Be deserving of the love they freely give.

 photo credit: dhammza via photopin cc

Dealing with Whining Compassionately

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Welcome to the April 2013 Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival: Peaceful Parenting Applied

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival hosted by Authentic Parenting and Living Peacefully with Children.  We hope you enjoy this month’s posts and consider joining us next month when we share about Peaceful Parenting Applied.

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Chances are, at some point or another, that tone has come out of your childrens’ mouths. You know the one. It’s the whine that grates on your nerves, making you want to pull your head inside your shirt, cover your ears with your hands, or leave. If you don’t deal with the whine, it just gets longer and louder and more, well, whiney. While you may find yourself wanting to walk outside and scream yourself, there are a few easy tips to keep gentle parents gentle at these times.

Don’t take it personally. This may be easier said than done, especially if the whine continues to include your name. Personally, when I begin to hear the “Moooooooom,” it takes on an entirely new level for me. As much as we may feel disrespected or underappreciated during these times, our children’s behaviors are not about us.

Define the cause. If the whining isn’t about us, what exactly is it about? That is the question of your day. You can’t begin to solve a problem if you don’t know what the problem is. Observe the situation. Think about what may be causing this seemingly annoying behavior, and set about making some changes. I know for my kids, whining signals that they are tired. We need to slow down, cut out some things, go for some quiet, easy going activities.

Connect with your kids. Yes, your child is whining and the last thing you may feel like is being around them, but when your children are exhibiting behaviors such as this, it’s a cry for help. They need you. Take a deep breath. Remember how much you love your children, and be there for them. Perhaps doing something with your child will be enough to break them out of their whining ways.

Actively listen. Everyone has bad days sometimes, and often we just need to have someone listen to us on those days. This is a great time to practice active listening so that your children understand that you ar ethere for them and that you really are listening.

Set personal limits for yourself. It’s okay to say that you are reaching your limit and that you would prefer to be spoken to in a normal voice. If you are having difficulty understanding because of the whining, explain that you can’t understand what your child is saying and that you need to know what they are saying in order to help.

Use play and humor. Try bringing a little levity to the situation by playing or using humor. When our children’s voices begin to take on that whining tinge, my husband has a difficult time understanding them. His go to phrase is “Hmmm. I couldn’t really understand what you said, but it kind of sounded like, ‘Daddy, you are the greatest!’” It hasn’t failed him yet. They will either laugh or take a deep breath to speak clearly.

Take control of your actions and words. As much as the whining may be driving us a little batty, we are still in control of our own actions. We get to choose how we act or react.

Remeber compassion. At the end of the day, think about the relationship you have with your kids. Every parent/child relationship is just taht – a relationship. remember to have compassion, both for your children and for yourself.

photo credit: polywen via photopin cc

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APBC - Authentic ParentingVisit Living Peacefully with Children and Authentic Parenting to find out how you can participate in next month’s Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival, when we discuss self-love!

 

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

 

Do you have blog posts about peaceful parenting or are you looking for some tips? This month, Authentic Parenting and Living Peacefully with Children are hosting an Authentic Parenting: Peaceful Parenting Applied link up! Check it out and help build a resource for parents striving to parent more peacefully.

An Easy Way to Make a Simple Compost Bin

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If you have wanted an actual compost bin but have been intimidated about how to go about it, her is an easy way to make an inexpensive one.

Do you have any large containers laying around? We had an old trash can that had previously been in the garage holding hockey sticks. We moved the hockey sticks and were considering what to do with this trash can. I realized it was a compost bin in disguise!

Take your container, in our case an old trash can, and turn it upside down. Drill some holes in the bottom, making certain to drill a hole in any area which is depressed so that rain water can easily drain through the holes. You don’t want rain water collecting and sitting in your compost bin.

It’s that simple. Set it upright and place it in an out of the way corner of your yard. You are ready to add your kitchen scraps, yard waste, or other organic material.

 

Family Tornado Preparedness

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I was watching a movie with my children when the subject of tornadoes came up. Answering their questions, I realized I was a bit rusty on my knowledge of everything concerning tornadoes, so we decided to do a little research to help us better prepare in the case of a tornado.

What exactly is a tornado? A tornado is made of wind. In a tornado, the wind is rotating in a vortex or column. This can uproot trees, sweep up houses, and cause a great deal of destruction. Similar to tornadoes are straight line winds. Straight line winds have the fast speeds of tornadoes without the rotations. They can be just as deadly.

Most tornadoes are very short-lived and cause only weak damage with winds under 110 mph. Strong tornadoes last more than 20 minutes with wind speeds up to 200 mph. Only a small number of tornadoes are considered violent tornadoes, lasting up to an hour with wind speeds greater than 300 mph.

What is a Tornado Watch? If a tornado watch is called in your area, it means that conditions may cause tornadoes to form but no tornadoes have been spotted. Keep an eye on the weather and listen for any further reports.

What is a Tornado Warning? A tornado warning means that a tornado has been spotted. You should take cover immediately.

Tornadoes can strike quickly, giving very little warning. Being prepared and going over emergency procedures can help children feel more secure.

Preparing for a Tornado

Make a plan:

  • Speak with all family members and plan where you will go in the event of a tornado. You should choose the safest location in your home. This is generally the lower level of your home, away from windows and doors. Choose an interior room or wall and take shelter under heavy furniture when possible. If you are in your vehicle, leave the vehicle and lay flat in a lower area such as a ditch. In the event of a tornado, do not open windows or doors, as this can allow debris and wind to sweep into the home.
  • Discuss ways that family members can prepare and reach the emergency location quickly.

Put together an emergency kit. This should include:

  • Non-perishable food. Pack enough non-perishable food for everyone in your household for three days. Stay away from salty foods and anything which increases thirst. If you pack canned goods, don’t forget to include a can opener.
  • Water. Have enough drinking water for everyone in your household for 3 days. You may want to include extra for sanitation. Consider one gallon per person per day as your starting point.
  • Light. In the event of a power outage, you may be without light. Pack candles and/or a flashlight or lantern. remember to include a way to light the candles or extra batteries.
  • Weather radio. Pick up an inexpensive battery operated or hand-crank weather radio to keep update on emergency weather conditions.
  • First aid kit. Have a first aid kit easily accessible in the event that someone is hurt.
  • Help signal. Include some way to signal others in the event that your home is destroyed. A signal whistle, horn, or flare gun may help alert others to your location.
  • Disposable wipes. Disposable wipes can be used for sanitation if you are confined to your location while waiting for help.
  • Duct tape. You never know when you may need duct tape.
  • Emergency information. Check out this handy information page that you can print out.
  • Pet supplies. If you have pets, pack some non-perishable pet food and possibly an emergency leash. Poo bags may also come in handy.
  • Trash bags. These can be used as makeshift toilets.
  • Entertainment. Consider packing some books, paper, crayons, or other items to help take children’s minds off of the storm.
Other items to consider:
  • Blankets or pillows to keep warm and sleep.
  • Any medications required by family members.
  • Extra eye glasses or other health care items.
  • Feminine hygiene products.
  • Diapers.
  • Extra clothes
  • Fire extinguisher
  • Rope
  • Important documents
  • Road maps
Here is a printable checklist to help your family gather supplies for your kit.

Practice for a tornado:

Most cities where tornadoes are likely to occur test their sirens monthly. If you children are anything like mine, they will have asked about the sirens. While these tests are to make certain that the sirens are working correctly, this is a fantastic opportunity to practice in case of a real tornado. Explain to your children that the sirens are just being tested, but that you want to practice what to do in case of a real tornado. Go through your tornado drill. If there is ever a time when your family needs to

Check out Tornadoes AHEAD: Owlie Skywarn’s Weather Book. This is a free printable coloring book with facts and other information regarding tornadoes.

Looking for books to read with your children? Try requesting some of these at your local library:

Oh Say Can You Say What's the Weather Today?: All About Weather

 

Oh Say Can You Say What’s the Weather Today?: All About Weather

The Cat in the Hat and various other Seuss characters are travelling in a hot air balloon where they encounter many types of weather.

 

 

Flash, Crash, Rumble, and Roll

 

Flash, Crash, Rumble, and Roll

Make storms a little less scary by reading about what causes them.

 

 

Eye Wonder: Weather

 

Eye Wonder: Weather

DK provides a valuable reference for children with their book on weather. Beautiful color photgraphy combined with clear information help demystify weather for families.

 

DK Eyewitness Books: Weather

 

For the slightly older child, check out DK Eyewitness Books: Weather This book covers the same topics with more depth.

 

 

 

photo credit: Florencia Guedes via photopin cc

Simply Living Blog Carnival April 2013 Call for Submissions: Going Green

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Welcome to the Simply Living Blog Carnival cohosted by Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children, Laura at Authentic Parenting, Jennifer at True Confessions of a Real Mommy, and Joella at Fine and Fair. We hope that you will join us on the third Tuesday of each month as we share posts about simple living in our lives. Submission deadline will be the second Tuesday of each month.

Going Green Just as simple living and voluntary simplicity have become catch phrases, so too has the phrase going green. How do green practices affect your decisions? Do you find that your simple lifestyle is in tune with environmental issues? Perhaps you have a practice or product which simplifies your life.

To submit an article to the blog carnival, please e-mail your submission to mandy{at}livingpeacefullywithchildren{dot}com anddelilahfineandfair{at}gmail{dot}com, and fill out the webform by April 9. Please write a new, unpublished piece for the carnival. We will e-mail you with instructions before the carnival date. We ask that you publish your post on April 16.

We want you to use creativity and to express yourself as you see fit. To that end, you are welcome to post at your discretion with a few guidelines in mind. Please be respectful in your posts. Avoid excessive profanity and poor grammar or spelling. As the co-hosts of the carnival are all advocates of peaceful living and gentle parenting, we ask that you not post about non-gentle practices or violence toward others. While we will not be editing your articles, we do reserve the right to not add your post to the carnival if it is not on topic, is poorly written, or goes against the guidelines which have been set forth.

Blog carnivals are a great way to generate blog traffic and build a supportive community. Your blog will receive links from many other blogs and you and your readers will have the opportunity to discover other blogs with similar goals in mind. Please join us as we embrace Simply Living through Simple Living! We hope you will consider joining us every month as we discuss ways we simplify our lives.

Supporting Self-Expression in Children

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Welcome to the March 2013 Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival: Self-Expression and Conformity

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival hosted by Authentic Parenting and Living Peacefully with Children. This month our participants have written about authenticity through self-expression. We hope you enjoy this month’s posts and consider joining us next month when we share about Peaceful Parenting Applied.

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When I was pregnant with our first child, my husband and I joked that if nail polish were ever to be involved, he would be in charge. He thought I was joking at the time, but painting nails was never something I wanted to do. My grandmother tried to no avail to interest me in the finer aspects of nail painting when I was little. I hated it with a passion and still do. In fact, until a couple of years ago, our home was a nail polish free zone.

We were walking in a store when my then 6 year old daughter asked if we could buy some nail polish some day. Part of me would have loved to give an excuse as to why we couldn’t buy nail polish, but really there was absolutely no reason I could give. Instead, I told her we would research what brands were better and see about getting some. A few searches later and I had found brands which were less toxic and yet still affordable.

Shortly after that, I made my first ever nail polish purchase in a variety of colors. My children, all four, sat around waiting for their turn to have their nails painted. This happened several times with quite a bit of excitement on their part, trying out different colors, having that one on one time, until for the most part it died down, with only occasional nail painting happening now.

We support our children in their self-expression, whether it is nail polish or something else. Childhood is a time to learn about who you are and what you believe. We have purchased and helped paint finger nails and toenails. We have picked up colored hairgel for washable hair expression. And while I do save hand me downs for my children, they always have the choice about whether they like the clothes and want to wear them or not. Our children have gone to restaurants dressed in costumes at times other than Halloween, much to my mother-in-law’s disbelief, and the dress up bin is for everyone to play with – no sexism here. For now we draw the line only at permanent changes. We will support our grown children’s right to piercings, tattoos, or even cuttings if that is their choice, but we believe it is our responsibility to keep that option for them until they are old enough to make those types of decisions.

Self-expression doesn’t end with bodies, though. We encourage our children to explore new things and see what it is they really like. It’s important to us that they have opportunities to do this, and we have made it work on a budget, mainly in part to my mad organizational skills to get businesses and venues to give us group rates (just don’t remind me of the aquarium trip with 150 people. It’s something I would prefer to forget). As an unschooler and parent, it’s my job to facilitate, not dictate, my children’s learning experiences. Since life is learning, this includes allowing them the opportunity to explore and express themselves.

I think it’s working well. When my then 9 year old son was questioned at gymnastics for wearing hot pink nail polish, he merely turned to the kid in question and asked, “Why shouldn’t I wear pink nail polish? I’m secure enough in myself to wear it. Colors aren’t sexist.” Apparently the other child had never heard such things.

For me, it’s not about allowing my children to express themselves but rather not preventing them from being authentic. It’s about my children being themselves.

photo credit: Melchorseg via photopin cc

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APBC - Authentic ParentingVisit Living Peacefully with Children and Authentic Parenting to find out how you can participate in next month’s Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival!

 

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

(This list will be live and updated by afternoon March 29 with all the carnival links.)