Tag Archive: punishment

Apr 30

Hitting Out of Fear

Living Peacefully with Children: Hitting Out of Fear

 Today is National Spank Out Day, I’m sad to say. In a society where we speak out against the hitting of women, against the hitting of racial minorities, against the hitting of animals, against the hitting and bullying of anyone, there are still a large number of people who think hitting children is perfectly acceptable …

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Jan 30

Living in Fear


I was up most of the night of December 2. I had been mixing applesauce cinnamon dough for a co-op class the next morning and had a severe allergic reaction. Around five o’clock in the morning of December 3, I kissed my husband goodbye as he headed to the airport for a week long business …

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Sep 24

NPN Blog Blitz: The Best of Babywearing


I am proud and honored to be a volunteer with the Natural Parents Network (NPN), a community of natural-minded parents and parents-to-be where you will be informed, empowered, and inspired. When you visit the NPN’s website you can find articles and posts about Activism, Balance, Consistent Care, Ecological Responsibility, Family Safety, Feeding With Love, Gentle …

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Jan 09

Growing Children


Photo by Rev Stan When we grow plants, we give them what they need to grow and be successful: sunlight, water, supports, fertilizer, and other nutrients. If they are having trouble growing, we look to see what else they may need or what we need to change. We don’t blame them when they fail. Instead …

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Aug 08

I’m Not Raising Corporate America


Photo by Justin Lowery I’ve often heard parents rationalizing punishments and rewards by citing the real world. When the kids grow up, they’ll be in the real world. In the real world, they’ll have to get a job and then, they had better be prepared. Punishments and rewards are everywhere, in the real world. This misses …

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Aug 02

Rewards: the Other Edge of the Sword


Behavioral training uses punishments and rewards in order to extract desired behaviors from the subject in question. Numerous studies support that the use of punishment in children, regardless of whether or not the punishment is physical in nature, has detrimental effects. Besides dissolving the connection between parent and child, punishments do not help the child to do better …

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Aug 25

training daughters…

A coworker was relegating to my husband at work about an incident he had experienced with his teenage daughter the night before. He had been yelling at her for something when she said something he felt was in a disrepectful tone – backtalk, at which point he slapped her across the face hard. I can …

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Aug 08

two wrongs don’t make a right…

Misbehavior and punishment are not opposites which cancel one another out. They enforce each other,breeding resentment, hurt feelings, and more of the same. No matter how you look at it, two wrongs don’t make a right.

Aug 05

coping mechanisms to parental power…

Children’s coping mechanisms to deal with parental power: Resistance, defiance, rebellion, and negativity. People will fight back when their freedom is threatened. Resentment, anger, and hostility. People want to be in control of themself. When others hold power over them, they feel resentful. Aggression, retaliation, and striking back. Parental domination via authority leads to frustration. …

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Jul 30

conflict: the no-lose method (part4)…

The no-lose method of conflict resolution allows parents to discover what is really going on with the child. When you use your power to enforce your own solutions, you don’t unveil the true underlying feelings and needs. In order to deal with an issue, you have to know what the real problem is first. Once you have …

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