Welcome to the July 2013 Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival: Anger
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Authentic Parenting Blog Carnival hosted by Authentic Parenting and Living Peacefully with Children. This month our participants have written about anger. We hope you enjoy this month’s posts and consider joining us next month when we share about breastfeeding.
Feelings…..nothing more than feelings….Anger. It’s a very real emotion and one that many parents have experienced. Anger, even when expressed in healthy ways, is not healthy tough.
How can a real emotion be unhealthy? It is unhealthy because it is a manifestation of our inauthenticity. You heard me correctly. While anger can be very real, it isn’t authentic.
Anger is actually a secondary emotion. It always follows after other emotions. While emotions point us toward our met and unmet needs, as a secondary emotion, anger doesn’t let us know what is going on.
When we find ourselves angry, we have ignored the primary emotions, the ones that were there to tell us about our met and unmet needs. We haven’t been honest with ourselves or with the people we love.
It is important to take the time to discover the primary emotion we are experiencing in order to address what is really going on. When we are being authentic, including with our parenting, we address issues before we reach that point of anger. Sure, there are times that we may be frustrated, sad, upset, or just feel unappreciated. The time to address those issues is when they occur. Bottling up our feelings until they explode into anger isn’t helpful to anyone.
Be kind to yourself and kind to your family. Acknowledge the primary emotions and work together to meet everyone’s needs. Be authentic.
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
(This list will be live and updated by afternoon July 27 with all the carnival links.)
- The One You Feed: Handling Our Emotions – Karine Murphy from The Wilde Womb writes about consciously choosing to regulate her own emotions so her children can too.
- The Inauthenticity of Anger – Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children discusses how when we ignore our true emotions, they manifest in authentic ways.
- Unconventional Un-Mad, Unconditional Love – Amber from Heart Wanderings reflects on how her responses to her son’s anger has shifted from shutting him down to supporting them both, through both conventional and unconventional methods.
- Anger is Just And Emotion – We tend to get frightful around strong emotions, especially the ones we categorize as negative, yet when we remove the weight, we unlock a different reality. Find out more at Authentic Parenting.
- Anger and Parenting – Being human means expressing a full range of emotions, including anger. Shonnie at Heart-Led Parenting shares her struggles and successes with honoring her anger without unleashing hurtful behavior toward her beloved daughter.
- Anger In Parenting – A Round Up Of Supportive Posts – Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama has written a lot about anger in parenting on her blog. In this post, Jennifer shares highlights from previous posts which include Unrealistic Expectations As Parental Anger Triggers; Addressing Your Anger; Ways of Reconnecting; and Considering the Impact of Anger Towards Your Children.