There is a difference between wanting to know the limits of another person's acceptance and of having another person set a limit on one's self. The difference is where the power lies. If we enforce our own limits, we exhibit self-control and encourage and enable our children to do the same. When we attempt to limit another person, we are attempting... Continue Reading →
should or could…
The word should is very negative. Its conditional nature breeds guilt and shame. Used about another person, it implies blame. Things we should have done are in the past and can't be changed. Things we should do in the future serve to set up guilt if we don't get them done. Acting how we should limits authenticity.... Continue Reading →
training daughters…
A coworker was relegating to my husband at work about an incident he had experienced with his teenage daughter the night before. He had been yelling at her for something when she said something he felt was in a disrepectful tone - backtalk, at which point he slapped her across the face hard. I can... Continue Reading →
take a deep breath…
Everyone tends to get frustrated at times. Our family is no exception. Whenever that happens, we remind each other, regardless of age, to take a deep breath. Taking a deep breath helps to calm us. The physical act of deeply filling one's lungs and exhaling reduces stress. When stressed, we breathe in short, shallow breaths; deep... Continue Reading →
a little birdie told me…
Our survival, as a species, is dependent upon others. Families, small communities, and tribal societies have long depended on cooperation in order to meet the needs of the group. As our population and technology have increased, the need for others has not diminished. The increasingly interconnected global nature of our world has been greatly aided... Continue Reading →
positive direction…
Everyone likes to feel that they have a purpose in life. Generally speaking, people want to be helpful, needed, and a contributing member of society (or a family). Sometimes knowing how to go about that is difficult. It can be even more so when you are small and have seemingly little to offer. When this need... Continue Reading →
Italian monkey bread…
Godfather's Pizza has really good Italian monkey bread. We discovered this when we went there for my pizza-loving husband's birthday. Buttery goodness with garlic and parmesan. I made our first homemade Italian monkey bread on a whim. I had some dough that needed to be used up. The kids needed a snack. The next thing... Continue Reading →
school supplies…
School supply sales are going on at stores across the country. As unschoolers, we aren't required to purchase a minimum 4 boxes of facial tissue, 20 #2 yellow pencils,10 colored folders, and so on. However, being the frugal (my husband is coughing and saying tight wad as he reads this) mom that I am, I'm not... Continue Reading →
cooperation is a survival skill…
Cooperation has long been a survival skill. Tribal communities have utilized cooperation in order to meet everyone's needs for millenia. With the advent of nuclear families, the focus on such cooperation took a back seat. Once again, with the increasingly interconnectedness of our society, it is once again becoming readily apparent that cooperation, along with communication,... Continue Reading →
summer reading programs…
Our family is no stranger to our local library. The librarians know us all by name. We are there quite frequently, checking out books, hanging out, or running in for a quick pick up of books on hold; a quick trip to the library for us is about 20 minutes. So, it seems to surprise... Continue Reading →
living peacefully with children 